Change My Name

For all you girls (because I have determined that no guys read my blog and if they do they leave no comments)...

This is the song that has been going through my head. Read and analyze--the song, not my head. It is by Cadet. It truly describes what I want and what He continues to do in my day by day.

"Seeking, hoping, trying to be who you want* fearful, thankful, able to see a difference*Change my name, change my name* I left myself and you remain* Change my name* Come and take away my pride* Break it, burn it, I know that you've always hated it* It's hard to say but I love you more than all of this* I love you more than this* When it's all lost, I find a freedom* When it's all gone, I find a life* So give me a name and I'm yours forever* Give me a name and I'm yours* Change my name, change my name* I left myself and I'm not the same* I left myself in yesterday* I left myself and you remain* Change my name"

Rudolph

I am not really thinking about Christmas, but my nose when I call this Rudolph. I stayed home from church today because I feel like crap and can barely speak. (as some people in the crowd go wild with screaming because, hurrah, Dessa can't talk) Last night I felt like singing Rebecca St. James' "God", but my sister told me to be quiet. She didn't tell me to shut up because I was really emotional and would cry at the drop of a hat. Some of you may identify with that.

I smell good right now. I got here and realized I needed deoderant so I used my uncles. Its Old Spice and smells really nice. (guys out there--Old Spice is hot, along with Stetson. Sadly though, I doubt any guys read this. Oh well.)

Last night when I was feeling so bad, I also worried about my friends and their troubles. I just really prayed for them hard. And cried, but that was expected. I cry easily and frequently. But I was just like, "God, what do I do?" He said, "Continue praying and doing what I ask." Sometimes His answers are so vague. And He reassured me that no matter how far down they went, He could still reach them if they called out to Him. So that helped. I don't want to see how far down they go; I want to see them rise, but He can and will rescue them. That is encouraging to me.

Do you talk to God? Does He answer you? Cause I can hear some of you saying, "How does/can God speak to you? He never does to me. Or He hasn't in awhile."

It's His Word. His Word is so wonderful. As you read it more and more, more of it gets stuck in your mind and heart. And then when you have questions and are crying out to Him like I was last night, it comes to your mind. And that is Him speaking. But we have to be ready to listen and commune with Him. Twila Paris said in one of her songs, "When He speaks to me, when I take the time to listen..." and that is it. Those words soothe your soul like none other can.

Last night concerning my friends, how I new what He was saying to me is He reminded me of Psalm 107:10-22. It says,

"Some sat in darkness and the deepest gloom, prisoners suffering in iron chains,

for they had rebelled against the words of God and despised the counsel of the Most High.

So he subjected them to bitter labor; they stumbled, and there was no one to help.

Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he saved them from their distress.

He brought them out of darkness and the deepest gloom and broke away their chains.

Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for men,

for he breaks down gates of bronze and cuts through bars of iron.

Some became fools through their rebellious ways and suffered affliction because of their iniquities.

They loathed all food and drew near the gates of death.

Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he saved them from their distress.

He sent forth his word and healed them; he rescued them from the grave.

Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for men.

Let them sacrifice thank offerings and tell of his works with songs of joy."

And that is what I pray for them. That they will let God rescue them and heal them.

God can also speak to you other ways but most common and the most trustworthy is His Word, the Holy Bible. And He will never tell you to do anything against or contrary to the Word. Never. If He does, it is not God you are listening to but someone else. A liar and deciever. Always check what you hear with His Word if it doesn't come from the Word. That is how you will know what is trustworthy and right.

Stuffy noses and making ditches

Currently I am struggling with a cold that my group of friends and I keeping passing back and forth among ourselves. We are practicing the Biblical principle of sharing in a sick, twisted way. Even my friend in Florida has it! I thought that was cool (another symptom of being sick, you want others to join in your misery).

I wanted to share also with you some stuff from Opened Windows by James Stewart. (Don't worry this is healthy, unlike the colds. I am sharing something good.)

He was talking about how to get the blessings of revival and what condition our hearts must have. And one of them that caught my eye was being prepared for the blessings so God will be able to pour them on you. And he used an image/story from the Bible.

In 2 Kings 3, the Israelites were stuck in a battle and they were sure they were going to die because they had no water. So they asked Elijah what they should do and he in turn asked God. And God said, "Make this valley full of ditches." After they were done digging the ditches God came and filled them full of water.

James Stewart says, "In like manner, when there is obedience on our part to the divine condition, there follows abundant blessing and continuous victory. The depth of the ditch shows the measure of the expected blessing."
The condition he mentions that is required of us for that blessing is true acknowledgement and confession of sin, "making ditches."
He says again, "There are times when we must stop praying for revival and get up from our knees and deal with the sin in our midst."
That really spoke to me in that I pray a lot for revival, but do I have a true revival, a turning away from my sin to the light that God offers? In myself I can see what that means for me, but as church I don't know what that means. Do we confront people of their sins openly? I always think, "I will pray for them and God will do it." But in that quote it says to stop praying for it, and deal with it. That is not openly accepted in our churches today. Charles Finney did it though. And he called people out on their sin from the pulpit. Wow! A bit scary. We say nowdays in our churches that judging a brother in Christ is wrong. But is there a difference between judging and dealing with sin? Where is the fine line there? I know there has to be one. In James 4:11-12 it says that God is the only one who can judge (which is true) and that we should stop judging one another. But in Matthew 18:15-17 it says that if a brother among you sins you should confront him quietly and if he continues to sin to meet with him and the elders and the pastor. And if that doesn't work to tell it to the church. If that doesn't work you are to "let him be as a heathen unto thee." I guess those two passages work together in unison when you think about it.
I wonder what our churches would be like if we followed those words.

It is something I have thought seriously about in the last few days. Please if you have anything to say or answer to my questions I have posed here, say something. It might be good to discuss.